The New York City Anti-Hipster Forum
Hipsters Are Annoying!

A Blog dedicated to all the absurd and annoying things hipsters do, say, wear, and probably, think.

It's time again for my New York City Hipster snapshot of the week:

Before I begin I'd like to wish a very happy birthday to Oscar Wilde who would have been 148 years old today.

Core As Hell — Corner of Bedford Ave. and 7th Street, Oct. 13, 2002

"Dude! Check it out! I got a copy of Peter Frampton Comes Alive on fucking vinyl! Can you believe that shit?"
"Oh, man, totally core."
"Yeah. It really, really is."
"Where'd you get it?"
"Off one of those street guys in Union Square."
"Totally core. How much?"
"Five bucks dude! And it's fucking mint!"
"Wow — core. Absolutely."
They bumped into each other on the corner. The short one, the girl, with the frosted Joan Jett fashion mullet and the white bullet belt was coming out of Pita Power, drinking wheatgrass. The other, the guy, with the pierced chin and the corduroy hat and the black-framed glasses was rolling a cigarette, but it was taking him a long, long time. He was bobbing his head, slowly, with his bulbous earphones and thirty-foot AC cord dragging from his Yak Pak. Oops. Ripped the cigarette paper. They hugged and kissed: 'mwah, mwah' on the cheeks.
"Dude," he said. "What’s your name again?"
"Mel."
"Oh yeah, totally."
"What’s your name again?"
"Billy."
"Oh yeah."
"Didn't I meet you that night at Doug's?"
"Ummm. Doug from Kansas City?"
"No. I was thinking Doug from Omaha."
"Oh, shit. Do you know Nicole?"
"Nicole with the red Jack Purcells?"
"No, she has some red Chuck Taylors though."
"Oh. That's core."
"Yeah."
"Hey," Billy said. "Did you go to Sarah Lawrence?"
"No. I went to St. John's."
"Core. I hear their humanities program fucking rules."
"I dunno. My major was Memory," she said.
"Core," Billy said. "I went to Oberlin."
"Oh, cool. My old boyfriend went there."
"Core."
"What did you study?"
"Musicology," said Billy.
"That's core as hell."
"Whatever," he said.
"Whatever," she said.
"Totally," Billy said. "So, you ever listened to much Frampton."
"No but I heard he's so fucking awesome. Completely revolutionary."
"Yeah he's pretty core," Billy said. "I was totally bummed when I heard he died. I was in my loft droppin' some beats and I was totally sampling from Crazy Framp when I just got this like completely Zen kinda feeling, like something just said 'Peter Frampton is no longer with us'"
"No shit?" she said. "I didn't know he was dead. That's totally sucks."
"Yeah, heart failure. It was just last month."
"Holy shit. I swear when I saw the cover I said to myself 'You-need-to-get-this-record,' I swear."
"Totally core dude."
"Yeah," she said. "Check out the cover! Awesome huh? The fucking hair! Awesome!"
"Totally," Billy said. "Man, why did they put some white dude on the cover."
"That's not him?"
"No way!" Billy said. "The Framp was black. But he got in a fucked up car crash in the Bahamas in the 70s and I think they had to do all kinds of fucking skin graphs and shit, so maybe he just looks white."
"Is that why he sings through that voice box thing?"
"Totally," Billy said. "But he used to play the vibes man, for Louis Armstrong."
"Wow, that's totally core."
"Yeah Framp played with all the greats, Benny Goodman, Gene Krupa, Charlie Mingus."
"Yeah," she said. "'Baby I love your way,' is sooo fucking core."
"Completely. He was like the first to record on the vibes."
"Yeah? That's core as hell! I'm so excited to listen to this!"
"Man," Billy said. "You gotta listen to 'Framp's Boogie Woogie,' and 'Hey Ba-Ba-Re-Bop,' that’s the real shit."
"Yeah," she said. "I love that song 'Show Me The Way,'"
"Totally. The vibes are so fucking cool."
"Totally," she said.
"Frampton's a fucking legend. I can't believe you haven't listened to him. You know the story of how he started playing the vibes?"
"How?"
"He was playing drums for Louis Armstrong at a session in 1930 and Satchmo asked him to play the vibes, and he did. And he was so fucking core that he just kept on playing the vibes. That's how the legend of Peter Frampton was born dude."
"Whoa."
"Yeah. You just don't hear that shit everyday either."
"Wow, that's totally core."
"You ever listen to Milt Jackson?"
"Oh totally," she said. "I love that song 'I'll Be There'"
"Yeah, great fucking vibes player."
"Jazz is so fucking core," she said.
"Totally. Core as hell."




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